People ask me periodically how I am getting through this difficult time in Israeli history. It has not been easy. I have found some new coping mechanisms that may help others. I would love to hear from you to know what new tools you’ve put into your tool box for times of need.
1. Community: I live in a beautiful community among many friends. At the beginning of the war, there were a number of evenings for parents, spouses and children of soldiers. As the war dragged on, one of my friends and I were brainstorming ways to feel more connected and supported and we decided to start a Mahjong group for mental health. It has been the most wonderful weekly way to unwind, check-in and laugh.
2. Exercise: I have always been a walker, and this has become even more important to me during these difficult times. Sometimes, tiring myself out is the only way that I can sleep and exercising with my husband each day allows for a check-in and much needed couples time.
3. Looking outward: There is always someone who could use support and assistance. Whether that means arranging to pick fruit on a farm in the South; calling a struggling neighbor; cooking for a woman whose husband is in the army; donating clothes to those in need or serving soldiers, getting outside myself helps me to focus on others and to leave my worries momentarily.
4. Supporting Israeli organizations: Similarly, I have poured time and money into Israeli organizations. This includes memorial fundraisers for fallen soldiers and organizations like One Family Fund, Zaka, the Pina Chama, Duvdevan and Golani to support the war efforts, victims of terror and soldiers. I have started following a Facebook group called Support Israeli Artists, which has over 23,000 members and showcases beautiful art, jewelry, clothing and other items. When I recently needed a new purse, I bought it on Etsy from an Israeli artist, and when I wanted to buy a few gifts for family members, I found unique jewelry at MyPaperTale. When a friend in the States asked for recommendations to send a care package to someone in Israel, I suggested Candy Corner, Gili’s Goodies and this company which gathers items from the North and South to package into gifts. As I’ve mentioned before, comedian Hanoch Daum has worked tirelessly since the war started to post daily on Facebook and Instagram about soldiers who are in need, reserve soldier businesses that need support, etc. I highly recommend following him.
5. Prayer and learning: I know this one might not be relevant for everyone, but I have found a few spiritually-related tools that have helped me during this time. I don’t connect to traditional prayer that well, but during one of my more difficult weeks a friend recommended that I purchase a book of Tehillim with English translations of the ancient poems to see if they would speak to me. I sat with post-it notes and went through all 150 psalms and I was really surprised by how incredibly relevant they felt to our modern day struggles. Similarly, I have drawn incredible strength from a collection of women’s prayers compiled by Shira Lankin Sheps, Rachel Sharansky Danziger and Anne Gordon called Az Nashir. I have a poem in the compilation and I was honored and excited to be included in the anthology; I was surprised by just how much these women’s prayers spoke to me. I bring my Tehillim and this anthology to synagogue with me and draw strength while reading the ancient and modern words.
I certainly gain strength each day with the support of my husband and children; I gain an incredible amount of pride seeing how my children have navigated this harrowing time and how they continue to lead lives of meaning and joy through it all. These five ideas have helped me to carve a path through the chaos.
